How can I be happy as a single Christian?

If you are asking this question it is clear that you are struggling with the issue of being single as a Christian. Perhaps you are lonely or frustrated and disappointed that you have not yet met the right partner? Perhaps you have been married but were divorced or your partner died? In whatever situation you may be we can’t argue that dealing with singleness can be a big issue in someone’s life.

Does God want us happy?

God wants his sons and daughters to be happy in whatever circumstances they find themselves in. In the past Christians have lived through all kinds of difficulties and persecution and there are Christians around the world experiencing these things right now. If these things are true then surely God’s grace can provide for us to be truly happy when we are living as single Christians?

So what are the requirements to activate God’s grace in our lives?

First of all where we focus our attention in great measure determines how we can draw on God’s grace. If we are focussed on ourselves then God is unable to provide for us as we are looking to ourselves to meet our own needs. God has provided means by which we can draw on his grace. In relation to the issue of singleness we would concentrate on what the Bible calls “fellowship”. The early church (in the book of Acts) is described as devoting themselves to it (along with prayer and the breaking of bread). So it must be important. In practise this means that we make sure that we spend time with our Christians friends and draw from their encouragement. They can lift us up and pray for us when we struggle from time to time. If we also devote ourselves to our friends then we are focussing on them and not on our needs.

Secondly, we must look at our singleness as an opportunity not as a burden. The Bible says that we are free to serve God without hindrance as single people. The married person has to spend some time looking after their spouse. The single person is free to go anywhere that God calls them. This is not the case for the married person.

A fundamental change of thinking in the minds of some single Christians needs to happen before they can really start to take advantage of their singleness. If a single Christian is dating and going to social occasions with the thinking that they are hoping to end their singleness then the way they may end up in a relationship could be out of desperation and not out of the desire to be with that person. Social occasions need to be approached with eagerness not with the mind of someone on the hunt for a partner.

So how can someone be happy as a single Christian? Recognise that God wants you to be happy, concentrate on fellowship with your friends, look on your single state as an opportunity and approach social occasions with eagerness.

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